


Our Secret Hideaway

by KillianJones32



Series: Unrequited Love? [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Fluff, Light Angst, M/M, Tumblr Prompt, about the guy who thinks he's, based on the prompt, but then realises he's, can be read as a stand-alone fic, homophobic to his roommate, just in love with him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-11
Updated: 2016-08-11
Packaged: 2018-08-08 04:58:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7744237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KillianJones32/pseuds/KillianJones32
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean struggles with his feelings for Seamus after he walks in on him snogging Ernie Macmillon.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Our Secret Hideaway

**Author's Note:**

> So I got a few requests to continue my story 'What If This Storm Ends?' and I had actually already written this separate to that story and posted this on tumblr but it kind of fits so I'm adding it as a kind of a squeal to that story. 
> 
> Based on the tumblr prompt I received: For the deamus prompt, I saw this headline (I would put a screenshot, but I can't attach pictures), the headline read "Straight guy worries he's being homophobic to gay roommate, realizes he's fallen in love with him.
> 
> You don't need to have read 'What If This Storm Ends?' to read this.

...

One of the things that Dean values most in the world is his friendship with Seamus Finnigan.

Ever since their first day at Hogwarts the two boys had been inseparable.

They didn’t always agree on things. Like when Seamus turned his back on Harry in 5th year or when Dean got chosen for the quiddich team and Seamus didn’t. 

But they never let trivial things like that get in the way of their friendship; both of them cared too much about the other to let that happen. 

However that was before Dean walked into their dormitory one day to find his best friend in a heavy make out session with Ernie Macmillan and instantly Dean had felt his heart plummet in his chest and felt an undeniable twist of pain in his stomach.

Two weeks have gone by since that day and Dean still hasn’t talked to Seamus and to be honest it’s killing him.

Sure Dean always had a feeling that Seamus fancied blokes. He never outright said it but he had never shown any interest in girls so Dean wasn’t all that surprised. 

What confused him was why he felt so sick and hurt by the image of Seamus with someone else. He just couldn’t understand why the memory of Seamus with his tongue down that blonde hufflepuff’s throat infuriated him so much. 

Dean never considered himself to be homophobic but seeing Seamus with Ernie just...just felt so wrong. 

And he hates himself for feeling this way. Because it’s Seamus, his best friend and why should it matter who he wants to snog? 

Seamus never complained when Dean dated Ginny a few months ago and Dean always had a feeling that Seamus never fully approved of that relationship; so what gave Dean the right to be annoyed at Seamus for being with Ernie?

Dean was so lost in his own thoughts that he didn’t notice the person walking towards him until he literally bumped right into them. 

“Oh I’m so sorry!” Dean exclaims, scrambling to regain his composure. 

He steps back, blinking rapidly and then he realises just who he has run into. 

Seamus. 

Dean takes a minute just taking in his friend, who he has been so careful to avoid these past few weeks. 

Seamus’s hair is a mess (Dean feels anger bubble in his chest at the thought of Ernie tugging Seamus’s sandy hair to make it that way), his soft Irish skin seems paler than normal and his eyes that are usually bright with happiness have dulled and lack their natural spark. 

Dean feels his throat tighten because Seamus looks so utterly exhausted. 

“Dean.” Seamus breathes lightly.

In that moment all the frustration, anger and confusion flees Dean’s body and all he’s left with is guilt. Ever since that nightmare of an evening, Seamus has been trying to catch Dean on his own but he has refused to talk to him. 

He began waking up earlier, ignoring Seamus in class under the pretence of taking notes, sitting with Harry at meals in the Great Hall and pretending to have to go to quidditch practice whenever Seamus tried to talk to him. 

That’s when Dean realises that this has been hurting Seamus just as much as it’s been hurting him and the overwhelming guilt almost crushes him. 

Dean manages a small smile, “Hey Shay”

Seamus’s eyes flit across Dean’s face rapidly, trying to gauge what his intentions are. 

“Can we...can we talk?” Seamus asks tentatively 

Dean hesitates for a second then nods.

Together they walk to their favourite hideaway in the castle. 

They came across it in their third year and it became their go-to place ever since. It was nice to escape from the hustle and bustle of the common room every once in a while to study, rest or just to talk somewhere different. 

Out of instinct, Dean pulls back the drapes for the shorter boy; Seamus looks up at him in surprise for a second before walking through. 

Dean follows suit and suddenly it’s just the two of them. 

Dean’s head is racing and his heart rate isn’t far behind. 

He hates the feeling that he gets when he looks at Seamus. 

It’s a distinct feeling of betrayal. Which only makes Dean more confused because why does he feel betrayed at the thought of Seamus kissing another bloke?

And that’s when it hits him. 

He’s so angry, so hurt and lost because Seamus wasn’t just kissing a boy; he was kissing someone who wasn’t him. 

In the back of his mind, Dean is aware that Seamus’s lips are moving and that he is watching him with a concerned expression but there’s only one coherent thought circling through Dean’s mind right now,

‘Holy shit I’m in love with my best friend.’

“Dean are you even listening to me?” 

Snapping out of his daze, Dean hurriedly clears his throat, 

“S-sorry I...could you say that again?” 

Seamus lets out an irritated sigh, 

“Look...I’m sorry I never told you I was gay. I really am. But I thought you already knew! It wasn’t like I tried to hide it! And you never seemed to have a problem with it but...you clearly do.” 

“I don’t.” It’s a weak protest after his appalling actions over the past two weeks but it’s true. 

“Oh come off it Dean.” Seamus sneers “You’ve been avoiding me for weeks! Ever since you saw me and Ernie together! If you don’t want to be my friend anymore because of who I am then say it to my goddamn face but don’t ignore me and then lie about it.” 

Dean swallows; the realisation of how much his actions have hurt Seamus hits him hard. 

“I’m sorry” He whispers, partly because he is and partly because he knows there is nothing else he can say to make up for his actions. 

Seamus rubs a hand over his face and Dean notices that his hands are trembling, 

“Will you just tell me why?” Seamus asks; his tone is quiet as if he has lost all the will to argue or fight. 

Dean has never seen him like this before. Seamus is always the most determined to make things right, to fix things but this time he just seems to be giving in. 

Well then it’s time for him to finally step up and fight for his friendship; especially seeing as he is the one in the wrong not Seamus. 

“I don’t care that you’re gay.” 

Seamus scoffs and Dean resists the urge to flinch.

“I really don’t.” He continues, “I...I thought I did. I was really beginning to question whether I was homophobic or not for a bit” Dean let’s out a half-hearted laugh “Because...seeing you with him...with Ernie...it hurt.”

Seamus’s mouth opens in shock but words keep pouring out of Dean’s mouth faster than he can stop them. 

“I didn’t understand why. I thought maybe it was because you hadn’t told me, I figured it was because I never knew you were dating him or interested in him and I was even worried that I was mad at you for liking blokes! But that wasn’t it! I was hurt and angry because I…I wanted it to be me. I wanted to be Ernie fucking Macmillan! I didn’t…I didn’t realise until right now but I did, I do. I’m so sorry Shay, I really am I-“ 

Dean’s rambling is cut off when Seamus strides over to him, places a firm grip on his robes and tugs him roughly down to his height. 

“Dean?” 

“Y-yeah?” 

“Shut up” 

Seamus doesn’t give Dean a chance to protest because a second later his lips are on Dean’s and he is kissing him as if his life depends on it. 

Dean remembered what it felt like kissing Ginny. It was nice, sweet, soft but also…rather bland. He had cared for her and fancied her quite a bit but…this is different.

Kissing Seamus is passionate. It’s hot and deep but there is something else behind it, something more, something meaningful. 

Something that just feels completely and totally right. 

Even when they have to pull away for breath, Seamus still keeps a firm grip on him, as if he’s afraid that if he lets go of Dean, everything will fall apart. 

“I’m not dating Ernie.” Seamus admits; his breathing ragged “He was just a distraction from you. Anyone I’ve ever been with has just been a distraction from you.” 

Dean can hear the vulnerability in his voice so he quickly wraps an arm around Seamus’s waist; pulling him closer. 

“I’m sorry it took me so long to figure out what I wanted” Dean smiles “But I want you...I…I really like you Shay.” 

Seamus kisses him gently, a grin tugging at his lips,

“I really like you too.” 

The word ‘love’ hangs unspoken in the air between them but neither of them feels the need to say it. 

They have all the time in the world for that. 

But for now Dean’s content with kissing his best friend in their secret hideaway until both of them forget that Ernie fucking Macmillan ever existed. 

...

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Please let me know what you think!


End file.
